No thanks, I prefer my racism one on one. — A month before the pandemic began to have its way with us I attended an auction/fundraiser for the son of my wife’s friend. The event was for a good cause and I was happy to support the family. The atmosphere, however, left me a bit anxious, and uncomfortable as I…

Maybe fear in others is a good thing especially when it’s the result of bullying. — I was picked on relentlessly when I was younger. Growing up Black in white suburbia, the bullying was, well… chef kiss. I didn’t just receive the garden-variety “early to late adolescent” harassment, I had the distinction of being the only Black kid in an all-white school, making me a frequent…

Blatant racism doesn’t even take a break for a moment so you can enjoy dinner. — When my son was younger, I had a brief window of time to spend with him on Tuesday and Thursday evenings — damn visitation order — so our typical go-to activity was to get dinner before I brought him back to his mother’s house. Distance limited our dinner options but…

Ignorant inquiries by racist troglodytes before the dinner rolls hit the table. — I’ve encountered all types of racists in my life, and there are many. There are those who are overt in how they come at you, those who are cunning in their delivery, and then of course there are those who hide behind their ignorance and pretend to have a willingness…

When a white woman’s tears come out, a Black person usually faces the consequences. — The day after the VP of Marketing was let go I received a call from the Director of Marketing asking for my thoughts on how to take the creative team to the next level. Being the senior member of the team and having been with the company for years, this…

Having one Black employee doesn’t mean your organization has met its promised diversity obligation. — With the exception of a six-month contract for a small start-up in Boston, I have been unemployed since November 2016. Aside from the passing of my mother a few years ago, these recent years have been the worst time in my life. If you’ve ever been out of work especially…

The grand ole strategy put into practice centuries ago is to either keep a foot on the neck of the Black community or to dismiss our existence entirely. — I’m 6'4", Black, and last I checked… male. Blending into the background is virtually impossible, especially in this country. I know, I’ve tried. This is beyond my control. When you are my height and, ahem… girth, you tend to stand out like an ogre about to devour little white children…

What do you get when a group of Black people gathers for a celebratory event? Happiness and joy (and even acceptance). — If you are complacent in an environment where you’re only seen as an “other,” you run the risk of losing your identity. Surroundings such as this can prove challenging when trying to explore your origins or define who you are. Having no marker to which you can relate only adds…

Mama said, “love who you love, as long as they are white.” — “Over my dead body!” “I don’t want that n****r in this house!” Only the tip of the iceberg of what has been said by white parents after learning their daughters were seeing me; even if just as a friend. Being Black in a predominately white space, after a while you…